| Sunday, July 10th, 2005 |
| 3:17 am |
so word. im just livin life yo. tryina get these HS parties i never went to outta my system. i hope they are out soon cuz they suck. in general im content. its good. i look forward to meeting new people and growing up a little more. but opportunities with nice girls pass me by left and right before i even realize they are opportunities. things like that make me a bit anxious and edgy. and seeing lots of kids who think they are cooler than they are trying their best to act cool. and things like airplanes. i have to ride a plane really soon just a week or so after my last fight. i was so nervous on that one i might have almost cried. so thats it really. things are good because even if theyre bad i know they can be good. man it took me long to realize that in life. i just gotta find someway to surpress this anxiety that dwells deep inside me. and i miss u guys on tour. |
| Tuesday, May 31st, 2005 |
| 3:13 am |
in the past 2 days i have been cooped up in my room working on this project that keeps getting all fucked up for at least 12 hours. do u have any idea how tempted i was to go out? i dont think ppl should stay in one place this much. it does things to you. my video seems quite short yet if i watch it twice its a half hour of my life gone. i could watch it 48 times from when i wake up and i could go right back to sleep again after that. wow time is shorter than u think. hey do u think the sound of the little boy screaming help outside in the woods that i hear right now is really just an animal? each night it seems to draw closer and closer to the house. |
| Tuesday, May 24th, 2005 |
| 5:24 pm |
i think i get it. over the past few years i have learned to be more sure of myself and more confident which is great cuz i used to be a real pansy. now i am just beginning to realize that i need to apply that to soemthing important besides partying and shit. its a little annoying because of how hard it was to learn to be happier with myself and here i am now i have another milestone to cover almost instantly. thats life i suppose. |
| Monday, May 23rd, 2005 |
| 3:04 am |
i just realized that i have to be way more on my own soon and in many ways i am way readier than i have been but i am not because i dont even know what the fuck i am passionate about. like if im on my own i think itd get old after a while if im not working towards something. its fucked up because i hate to take the things i am passionate about seriously. it kind of kills it for me. maybe i should be catholic or something. those rapist priests would keep me in line.... |
| Sunday, May 22nd, 2005 |
| 8:27 pm |
dear some of my friends, i love you but i am not responsible for other ppls problems. sooooo many people are hasseling me at once right now but i am just a stupid piece of shit 19 year old who hasnt gotten outta high school yet and i have a lot of growing up to do myself. things are best learned on ur own anyways. i have a damn senior project to do in like a day! i wish i was a jedi knight!!! Current Mood:  stressed |
| Tuesday, May 17th, 2005 |
| 1:11 am |
im pretty much going away soon. shit maaaan. i should stop sitting around on that god aweful piece of garbage AIM all the time and hang out with people i care about and do fun things and not fuck up this mod and do that stupid capstone thing. there are a lot of people around here i care about that i wont be seeing next year and i think i should stop fuckin worrying about not seeing them and just chill with them worry free and make the best out of everything. worrying is so stupid but i suppose i worry sometimes cuz im insecure. but at least im secure enough to know that im insecure. which means maybe i can change that. hopefully i can make a good change in the next like 5 minutes.... poof! good, it worked. |
| Monday, May 9th, 2005 |
| 4:21 pm |
tomarrow im getting my hair cut at a fancy salon by a gay guy named franchesco. ohhhhhh man... Current Mood:  nervous |
| Sunday, April 24th, 2005 |
| 7:16 pm |
haha i just woke up at 7 pm |
| Thursday, April 7th, 2005 |
| 11:49 pm |
i have fallen into a daily routine this mod. school, skate, evening skills, sit at comp. i fucking hate routines. i really really do. it makes me all empty. i need excitement and shit. its the weekend tho soon, last one up north and weekends arnt routines they are all impulsive and fun. well, they most certainly shouldnt be routines that is. ahem ahem. yeah im talking to u. but u know whats cool about evening skills? hell i havnt been this caught up in school after a week in longer than i can remember today i thought about all the people i dont see enough who id really like to see like all the time. last weekend of the season without bustin my ass up to shitty ass killington. and there are mad people i wanted to snowboard with so fuckin bad and i just didnt. and old friend that i would have loved to snowbaord with and chill with soooo much that i just never see drove by my house today and he waved at me and yelled at me. u know i think about all these motherfuckers taht i wanna chill with way more and its like shit theres so fucking many of them then i just get stressed out and just do nothing about it. it seems like too much to do and too much to think about so i just dont do fuckin shit. it makes everything worse but procrastination the story of my life. |
| Sunday, March 20th, 2005 |
| 7:21 pm |
after watching the ring 2 yesterday me and my buddy tyler agreed that the only movie we have ever seen that has truly scared us is event horizon. who has seen that movie? cus if u havnt u ought to. its pretty cool to be able to say, "yeah ive seen the scariest movie ever." i am telling u all to watch it cuz its just so fucked up and scary and i really wanna watch it right now cuz i havnt seen it in so long. yall should stay at ur house alone and turn off all the ligths and watch that movie and u will not be able to sleep and thats exactly waht i want to do right fucking now but i cnat cuz i dont own the movie and its really agitating me. |
| Friday, March 18th, 2005 |
| 11:13 pm |
id really like it to snow over spring break. |
| Saturday, March 5th, 2005 |
| 1:32 am |
u know it seems to be a pretty solid rumor at school that i am into boys. hell yall even think im dating andrew or some shit. but thats cool, everyone should keep thinking that. itll make my high school career a whole lot funnier to look back at. but whatever u think i am still into girls so im here for u ladies no matter how gay i may seem. really i swear. Current Mood:  drunk |
| Monday, February 21st, 2005 |
| 7:15 pm |
today i shralped some sicky pow pow. yo im fuckin a lil skitzo or somethin yo. i always refer to myself as "we" when i talk to myself. thats fucked up dog. |
| Monday, February 14th, 2005 |
| 11:35 pm |
its all about the pop idiot. happy v day assholes. |
| Friday, February 11th, 2005 |
| 10:48 pm |
i am so 5th wheel right now and i am just acting drunk and obnoxious and interrupting and pissing everyone off and this great. its awesome i am happy. i am singing that song real loud FOREVER YOUHGNT I QANT TO BE FOOOOOOOOREVER YOUNGGGGGGGGG DODODODODODOODD hahahhahahahahha what a great song |
| Thursday, February 10th, 2005 |
| 5:26 pm |
WOAH!!! was that a 360 nose indie high dive!?? |
| Wednesday, January 26th, 2005 |
| 3:21 pm |
today i went to B block with my snowboard gear on. i walked to cat rock and almost died there. i got a concussion and at first i didnt remember anything like how i got to cat rock or how i got my snowboard gear. sweet. a couple mroe and im dead. woohoo. |
| Friday, January 21st, 2005 |
| 11:13 pm |
the freezer is full so i left lots of pizza on the back porch in the snow, what a great idea. but shit i hope racoons dont eat it. and i just took mad hits in the bathroom and realized the fan was broken afterward. my mom will get pissed. but she is a gimp with that broken ankle and cant do shiiiiiit. i had to drive her to the market and i did awesome! yeah i had kinda a stupid night cuz i just sat on the comp and helped my mom and just felt sad. yeah im gonna cry about it. peace. wow it is so cold in hear the heat is broken and i have a small heater and i can go to it whenever im cold. this is fucking amazing i feel great. |
| 6:10 pm |
i stayed in tonight cuz my mom broke her ankle. i feel like im going to do a lot of staying in this weekend. crap what a shitty weekend this will prob be. someone call me. |
| Monday, January 17th, 2005 |
| 6:42 pm |
well that weekend went by in a flash. at the same tiem i dont feel like ive been at school in months. id tell u fools how it went but i dont remember cuz i was in a daze the whole time for one reason or another. i dunno what went down. cue me in please. |
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